Old Habits

People find it difficult to change their accustomed behavior.  Like the old proverb says, old habits die hard. 

I think I have finally broken one of my nasty, old habits.  In the past when I was sad, depressed, stressed, or angry I would turn to food.  And I would go 100%.  I would eat a half a bag of chips, but that wasn't enough, so then I'd find something else, oh yeah, ice cream.  A big huge bowl of it.  I'd try and trick  myself into thinking it was enough, but it wouldn't work.  Within an hour of eating that, I'd be up again looking for something else.  A cookie or two, or three.  Now that I think about it, it was disgusting. 

But I'm find now that when I'm feeling any of the above emotions, I'm taking them out at the gym, in a hard, beat the crap out of someone, workout.  And it feels great!  I feel amazing afterwards, and I know I'm getting a great workout instead of stuffing myself with food that I don't need and isn't good fuel for my body.  Sure, I still have a craving for ice cream every now and then, but nothing that I can't nip in the bud with a low cal, low fat treat.  It literally is just a taste that I need now, not the whole container or box.

Knowing that I'm fueling my body in a better way makes me feel great!   I'm happy that I was able to break this habit. 

"Motivation is what gets you started.  Habit is what keeps you going."  Unknown

Success!

Sorry I've been slacking on my blogging...my REAL life has taken over!  A cranky, teething, growing baby, and the hubby's car has been in the shop for a few days and will be there for a few more.  It's all exhausting! 

Anyway, you don't want to hear about that!  You just want to hear about how my journey is going.  And it's going good!  I'm still 100% focused, and I'm still 100% in it, to win it!  Winning what you ask?  My health, my body back, my energy!  It's all worth it!

I didn't go to the gym Thursday night because I didn't have my car, and I could have gone when my husband got home, but at that point, I wasn't up for it.  I just wanted to stay home.  So I did.  When I woke up Friday morning, I felt yucky, and was in a slump, and I just felt off.  I weighed myself thinking I had gained, and that's why I was not feeling it.  But I didn't.  I had actually already lost a pound, so that was comforting to know I didn't miss a workout and gain. 

Last night I went to the gym to make up for it.  It was me and all the youngins' getting their workout in before a night out of drinking and hanging with friends.  Too many of them were on their cell phones while working out, planning their night out.  Funny to me, because I could never be on the phone with someone while I was working out.  The person on the other line would think I was being chased down a dark alley with the way I am while I workout!  LOL

I learned the last few days that I do like my routine, and that it makes me feel good.  I now know that my 5 day a week routine, sometimes 6, depending on how my week is going, is what I need to keep up with my journey.  Sometimes life does get in the way, but I have to figure it out and keep going strong...

"Action is the foundational key to all success!" ~Picasso

Will power!

Sorry it's been a while!  I've been busy keeping up with princess!  =)

Today is weigh in day, and it's also Fat Tuesday.  Gross!  Why do we have to call it Fat Tuesday?!??!  Oh that's right...Mardi Gras means Fat Tuesday in French.  Why can't we just keep it as Mardi Gras?  I know, I'm reading into it way too much.  I guess I notice all that stuff now.  Just like I notice people driving in there car, stuffing their faces with salty french fries, and greasy cheeseburgers, and whatever else they can get quick.  And most of those people shouldn't be eating it.  Actually, no one should be eating that stuff.  Why is it that stuff that is fast, and convenient for us is bad for us?  Doesn't seem right does it?  Why can't we have a drive through fruit and veggie place?  hmmm...I may be on to something here!  =) 

I guess I'm in a mood to ask the tough questions today. 

All I know is that you have to be motivated and have the will power to stay away from those places, and those kinds of foods.  Yes, it's Fat Tuesday, but that doesn't mean you have to eat yourself stupid today!

Hope everyone enjoys there day, and hope that everyone stays motivated.  I'm glad I'm inspiring people to get healthy!

I CAN do this!

After my weigh in yesterday I felt so good, and so proud of myself.  For those of you that know me, that's a rarity.  I hardly ever pay myself a compliment, (I know, it's an issue I'm working on) and yesterday, I was so proud! 

I lost 2.2 pounds, and hit my first 5%.  When I looked at my little weight loss record book, I thought to myself, wow, I can really do this.  Sure it's hard.  But I'm focused, and am just feeling it this time around.  My mom told me yesterday that she could hear it in my voice that I'm just going to do it. 

Sometimes I let myself enjoy a meal, but I don't let it derail me, and I don't lose focus.  I just enjoy that one meal, and then I move on.  I'm not going to deprive myself.  I enjoyed the pumpkin muffins last night, and it they were yummy.  It was worth it to me.  I accounted for it.  I'm allowed to do that.  I'm a sweet tooth girl.  I like it, I want it and I allow it.  If I shut out foods that I enjoy, then I wouldn't be doing this, and I wouldn't be succeessful. I would get frustrated, irritated and then cave to them and then completely give up.  And I'm not going to do that this time.  I have this little monkey to keep me going.

Look at that face?  How can I not want to be around as long as I possibly can for her?  How can I not push myself to be healthy and happy?  She is the love of my life, and I want only the best for her, in every single aspect.  I want her to have a healthy, happy, energetic mommy that will be able to run around with her and play with her and take her to fun places.  I want her to know what healthy is, and I never ever want her to struggle with the same things I have gone through and are going through.  I want her to know that life is so precious, and to enjoy every single second of it.  Her face, her smile, her giggle runs through my head when I put food in my mouth, when I run on the treadmill, and when I dance around in my classes.  She's worth every single sweat, tear and calorie.  She's worth it all!

It helps that I have so much support to make this lifestyle change.  It helps to have good people around me, and it helps to not have doubters.

I can do this, and I am doing this, and it feels good!

My inspiration...

Hope everyone had a great weekend!  I know I did.  I got to hang out with some friends on Saturday night, and then I got to see my family yesterday for a few hours.  I got to spend some time with my grandma.  She really enjoyed seeing Reese, and she wanted me to stand up so she could have a good look at me with the weight I've lost. 

My grandma has always been my biggest supporter.  If the world could see me through my grandma's eyes, I'd be bigger than Oprah.  =)  She always makes me feel better about myself.  I grew up watching my grandma do it all.  She never drove, but that didn't stop her from getting everything done that needed to be done.  She walked everywhere, or took the bus.  And some of my greatest memories of her is walking to the grocery store, or White Castles for some lunch.  I was her little shadow.  I wanted to be with her all the time.  I still do, but it's hard, being I have my own family now, and I live 35 miles away.

As I watched my grandma yesterday it made realize that if she can go through what she's gone through the past 5 years, I can lose this weight.  I mean really, she is my inspiration.  Sure, Reese is, and always will be my #1.  But my grandma is a very, very close behind her. 

I want to make myself proud, and lose this weight once and for all.  But now, more than ever, I want to make my grandma proud, no matter how she sees me already!

"First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do!" Epictetus

Go Big or Go Home!

Tonight I had my Team Weight Loss class.  Thursdays are a shorter workout because Jim (the trainer) does about 20 min. of nutrition.  So tonight I got their about 30 min. early so that I could get in an extra 30 min. of cardio.  I got the treadmill I liked and was content with just me and my iPod when a woman in the class showed up.  I cringed inside knowing that I'd have to deal with her negativity and with her constant complaning.  She's one of those.  Debbie Downer.  She complained about her "zones" being too high, she complained that she was tired, she would be vocal outloud when Jim would have us do something she didn't want to do, or was hard.  I seriously had a hard time ignoring her.  She does it every single class, and I usually am not near her.  She's usually across from me in the other row of treadmills.  Sure, I could have moved, but I didn't want to be rude.  I just worked hard and did my workout.  Jim has high expectations of all of us and he knows what we all want to be able to do individually.  He knows my goal is to be able to run again, and he knows I'm on a weight loss journey.  So yeah, sometimes he picks on me, and pushes me.  Pushing me out of my comfort zone, which he did tonight. 

He told me I could run at a 4.8 for 2 minutes and I thought to myself no way can I do this.  He saw the fear in my eyes, but he said he was confident in me and he wouldn't let me do something that was going to get me hurt.  I trust him, and I had to trust him in this situation. The fastest I have gone is 4.5.  Sure I've done sprints, but literally for only 15-20 seconds.  I took a deep breath and found a focal point.  I turned my iPod up just a little to really focus.  And I did it!  I ran that 4.8 for 2 minutes!  I was so proud of myself!  Jim stood their smiling.  He said "I told you so..." 

Then it was Debbie Downer's turn.  She doesn't run, which is fine.  He wanted her to fast walk.  Okay, she can handle that right?  No way, according to her.  I can't walk that fast.  He wanted a 3.6 speed for 2 minutes.   He said the same thing to her, but she kept saying she couldn't do it, or she'd start and then she'd stop.  I can tell he was getting frustrated with her, and vice versa.  But he wouldn't let her give up that easy.  I think it was like the 4th time in, and she was literally 20 seconds away from being done when she stopped.  I totally reminded me of the Biggest Loser when contestants would be so close to running the full minute, or whatever they do, and then stop.  I was in my cool down stage, so I was able to turn to her, and I said to her, you can do this.  And she looked at me with her pathetic eyes, and frowned.  I said, you can do this!  I told her I had never run at a 4.8 before, and I just did it for 2 minutes.  I told her she could borrow my iPod, and to find a focal point.  She said okay.  She took my iPod, she got her focal point and she did it!  She was able to finish the 2 minutes.  She was happy,  Jim was happy and I was proud of myself for being that "coach" that she needed. 

After class she thanked me for giving her that extra push.  I told her no problem, and then I finished it by saying "go big or go home!"  She had never heard this before, (really??) and she was going to use that has her motivation when she was working out on her own.  She was going to say it over and over in her head.  Hey, whatever works right?  I could tell she was happy with her achievement and I couldn't help but be happy myself for helping her.  It made me feel good.

So whatever your goal is.  To lose weight, to run a mile, to quit a habit, to cut down on drinking coffee.  Whatever it may be, you can do it.  Go big or go home!

"People with goals succeed because they know where they are going."  Nightingale

My 3rd week

Well, I did it!  I lost 2 more pounds.  I'm thrilled.  I wasn't feeling too confident going in, and I don't know why.  I tracked every single thing that went into my mouth this week, and I worked out like I normally do.  Maybe the fundraiser on Saturday threw me off?  Who knows!  All I know is I'm tickled pink with my loss.  I'm soooo close to 2 goals I have.  One being getting below a certain weight, and the other one is hitting my first 5%.  WW goes with 5% first, then 10%.  Hitting my first 5% will feel great!  I can't wait to do it.  I shouldn't have any problems doing it next week. 

A few people have asked me to give a run down of what I eat in a day and what I do for exercise.  In this blog, I'll give a run down of what I eat, and next time I'll talk about my workouts. 

On Tuesdays, I eat super light.  I don't like to go heavy.  I'm a little neurotic when it comes to weigh in days.  =)  I will eat a great breakfast.  Usually oatmeal, (I like the quick oats) and I add in fresh fruit, some fat free milk, and half a sweet and low packet.  I know it sounds gross, but sometimes I'll add in my healthy oil for the day.  With the fruit and the milk, I can't even taste it.  I have to get it in at some point in the day, and I'll be honest, I don't always get it in.  I forget about it.  I know, bad Kimmie!  lol
And then for lunch on Tuesdays I'll do a salad.  Again, I'll sometimes do my oil here if I didn't do it at breakfast.  I'll use it as my dressing and then do pepper and some extra veggies.  If I have avocado, I'll slice up a few pieces.  Literally it's only like 3 pieces.  I don't overdo it.  And I'll also drink less water on Tuesdays.  I don't want water weight for my weigh in.  I drink sooo much water throughout the day.  I usually drink anywhere from 60 to 100 ounces in a day.  Depends on the day, and depends on what I eat.  And yes, for those of you wondering, I'm always running to the bathroom.  lol  I stop drinking water around 1pm on Tuesday and not eat or drink anything after that so I have plenty of time to get it all out of my system before I weigh in.  I know!  I'm crazy.  I also wear my lightest clothes.  If I could, I would strip down to nothing.  lol  I'm silly like that.  I usually wear the same clothes every week.  I know!!!  =) 

On a normal day, I'll eat oatmeal or Multi Grain Cheerios.  I'm loving the peanut butter ones right now.  With some banana in it, it's delicious!!  Once Reese goes down for her morning nap, I usually sneak in a little snack.  Maybe another piece of fruit, or a yogurt.  Sometimes both.  Oh, I'll have a hard boiled egg once in a while too.  They are yummy and high in protein.  Just depends on how hungry I am.  For lunch, I tend to want crunch, so I'll have a salad, or I'll have a WW meal.  I need to get a little more creative with my lunches.  Lunch is hard for me because I'm not always super hungry.  I sometimes have to force myself to eat.  Occasionally I'll have a whole grain piece of bread toasted, with a tablespoon of peanut butter and that's enough for me.  Dinner is my hardest meal, because most nights I'm not home.  I don't get home anywhere between 7p-8p.  I HATE eating that late.  But again, I have to.  I tend to do WW meals for dinner too.  Other nights, I'll have something light.  A yogurt.  Brown rice, with salmon or chicken and veggies.   I like my sweets so I tend to have a little something after dinner.  WW has little snack bars that I love.  They are yummy, and hit the spot. 

It's all about portion control.  If you measure everything and account for everything you eat, you will have control.

At my meeting tonight, there was a great little quote that our leader told us.  I LOVE it so I'm going to share it here!  It'll be my quote tonight. 

"If you bite it, write it
If you drink it, ink it
If you snack it, track it
If you nibble it, scribble it
If you steal it, reveal it
If you grab it, blab it
If you lick it, Bic it
If it goes in your smacker, it goes in your Tracker
If you ingest it, you guessed it -
Grab your pencil before you utensil"

Hope everyone has a great week!
"Nothing tastes as good as healthy feels"

Full Moon Maybe?

I don't know what it is, but I'm just not feeling it today...maybe there's a full moon that I don't know about?  I have no energy, and I literally want to stay in bed all day.  But alas, I can't.  I have to get moving and do what I need to do, and that's workout.  I feel like I really need a good workout to feel better.  I don't feel like I've lost anything this week...I don't get it.  I can usually get a feel of how my week has been, and this week, I have nothing.  No feelings either way. 

With the Park Lawn fundraiser Saturday night I did pretty darn good.  Every single thing I put in my mouth I tracked.  I held myself accountable for everything.  Even the yummy, delicious chocolate cupcake I ate.  I knew I'd have something sweet, but I also knew I'd account for it.  I'm still going to have stuff like that, that's why WW works for me.  I can't have restrictions.  If I do, I fail.  I don't deprieve myself of anything.  Again, if I do, I wouldn't fail.  Sunday morning my husband I went to breakfast and it took me a while to figure out what to eat, because I tracked it.  I had to make it worth every single point I was eating.  My breakfast was a little more points than normal, but we don't go out to breakfast very often, so I decided to let myself have what I wanted.  But, I didn't pretend I didn't eat it, because I did.  Every single bite of it.  I also was proud of myself because instead of getting the hash browns, (which are one of my favorite foods in the world) I substituted for the fruit.  Yay me!  And it was good fruit too.  I would have been disappointed if it wasn't fresh and good, but it was.  Nothing worse than a nasty piece of fruit.

I did make a yummy WW chili dip yesterday to have during the Superbowl.  Everyone ate it, and everyone seemed to enjoy it.  The biggest points were the chips.  Darn chips!  I'll have to come up with something else for the next time I make it.  But that's how you learn what to eat and not to eat.  It's 100% up to you.

Tonight is my Team Weight Loss class.  An hour of pure torture on the treadmill.  I really hope he does some sort of circuit tonight.  I feel like I get so much more out of it.  After the hour, I will jump into the Salsa Funk class.  My absolute favorite!!!  I dance my booty off and get in a great workout too.  I'm hoping for a 1000 calorie burn tonight at the gym.

Hope everyone had a great week, and I'll be sure to post how I do at WW tomorrow night. 

Until tomorrow... "Your work is to discover your world, and then with all of your heart, give yourself to it."  Buddha

The Weekend!

It's Friday!  I'm thrilled for many, many reasons. 
Fridays are my favorite day of the week even though I'm a stay at home mom.  I feel like I have more control of myself.  I know, seems strange right?  But I just feel like I get more out of my weekends than I do during the week. I feel like I get in great workouts, get to plan my meals better and spend more time with my hubby.  =)  awwww

Today Reese goes to physical therapy as she does every week.  But today is special because she is getting an evaluation.  Reese has done so much over the past week it's amazing!  She's crawling like a mad woman, and she's drinking from her sippy cup by herself.  She truly inspires me to reach my own goals.  We've come a long with her, and I'm so proud. 

This weekend is a busy one for us.  Tomorrow night we have a fundraiser dinner for my cousin's organization.  It's an amazing event, and we had a great time last year.  We are looking forward to it.  What I'm not looking forward to?  Not knowing what's to eat.  I won't be able to figure out my WW points ahead of time.  But that's okay.  I'll figure it out.  I was able to do it last week with 2 parties, and I lost 3.2 pounds.  I'll be picky with what I eat on my plate, and then I'll shake my booty on the dance floor and burn off the calories.  I'm also planning on going to the gym tonight to get in a good workout and then I plan to workout tomorrow morning as well.  So 2 good calorie burning workouts should do the trick.  And of course, I'll workout on Sunday morning too.

I'm soooo close to hitting my first 5% at WW.  I set myself a hefty goal for Tuesday's weigh in, but I feel with being down and out yesterday with a migraine I won't make it.  I'm not going to beat myself up about it.  I had to get myself better, and I did.  I feel better today.  I got a lot of sleep yesterday and overnight and I feel so much better.  I hope that I can get to my hefty goal, but if I don't, I'm not going to freak out.  I'm going to take what I get and be happy.  What a different way of thinking for me.  In the past, I would be so mad that I didn't hit my goal.  Now?  If I lose, I'm happy!  I'm in such a different frame of mind this time around, and I really feel like I'm going to make it happen.  2012 is my year to get healthy, happy and fit! 

Starting next week I'll get more into what I'm eating on a daily basis and what kind of exercises I'm doing.  I know some are interested, so I will start on Monday. 

I hope that everyone has a fabulously, healthy weekend!  Have fun!
"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to continually be afraid you will make one." - Elbert Hubbard

hmmm...this should be interesting!

Hey all!  I've been asked to blog about my weight loss journey so that I can answer questions that everyone has.  Sure, I can do that.  I think.  =)

I have battled with my weight for as long as I can remember.  I go up and down, and fight, and fight and feel like I constantly lose.  For some reason, this time feels different.  Why, I'm not sure.  I have more motivation to see results, more reasons to get healthy. 

Almost everyone that will read this (I hope!) knows that it took me 9 years to get my baby girl, Reese.  9 long emotionally, mentally and physically draining years.  Now that I have her I don't want to be that mom that can't play with her when she wants to play, who wants to run to the park and can't run.  I want her to have to catch up to  me. 

So here we go. Here goes nothing...I'll blog about it all.  The ups, the downs, the good, the bad and the ugly. 

If you read this, and you want me to talk about something specific, let me know, and I'll do my best to answer your question, or ask someone who knows.

Hope you all enjoy!
"The future depends on what we do in the present." - GandhiThe future depends on what we do in the present. - Mahatma Gandhi